Kairos

So thanks to Ryan Gosling at the amazing people over at Rhet/Comp Ryan Gosling, I will never again forget what kairos is. You shouldn't either. You can thank me (well them) now.

HERE

Kairos is saying the right thing at the right time. For Facebook, this can mean a number of things. For example, it is considered rude to attack political views and groups of people on the internet, but people still do it. It is considered bad taste to leave inappropriate comments on friends' posts or to post photos of them they may not want their boss to see. 

Everything you post on Facebook is pretty much visible to anyone - especially your friends or friends of friends. (Unless you have your privacy settings set up very carefully, which I've sort of given up on as it's like trying to navigate a minefield to find any of the settings I'm actually looking for.) More and more, employers are looking at a potential employees Facebook or even regularly checking up on their employees. HR has become more and more important in this world and no company will "turn the other cheek" if an employee is publicly complaining about their company in this style of digital environment which can serve as a permanent record. 

Therefore, the following are "kairos" guidlines:

1. Keep some things private - While kairos is saying the right thing at the right time, there might not EVER be an appropriate time to tell all 893 of your Facebook friends that you are "dilated to a 3 and can't wait to go into labor." Pregnancy used to be private and something that no one spoke of, while it's not quite that under wraps now (I'm glad), that doesn't mean we all need to know every little graphic detail of each step. Share that information with close friends or relatives by using the message feature. They are private and can keep uncomfortable things away from the eyes of others. Besides, what if your eight year old cousin sees that? Wouldn't you just LOVE to be his mother and have to explain that to him?
2. Be professional - I feel like this might come up under every point, but as college students shift gears from a life of parties and studying and into the life of business suits and pay checks, it pays (literally) to not share every detail of your weekend on your Facebook. Even if your company doesn't allow you to access the site from work (many don't), co-workers may still want to add you as a friend. Unless you are going to deny all these requests, it's better just to keep things professional. Besides you never know who your boss or supervisor might know and keeping the pictures from last year's Homecoming Reunion keg stand off radar just sounds like a good idea. Along with kairos, I would say "right place." Venue and method of communication seems to have a lot to do with right time and saying the right thing. Facebook isn't the best place to share these photos. Start a private gallery that only people with a sign in or link have access to and relive the "glory" days there.
3. Be vague (sort of) - When in doubt, leave out names or specifics of things that are bugging you or people you "hate." Or just don't write anything about it at all - like most mothers say "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all."
4. Be timely - Don't post over exaggerated status updates about events that happened long ago that were upsetting. There is no need to re-hash old family or friend drama just for the sake of it. Instead, write happy compliments and comments to your friends. There is enough negativity in the world - say good things. You never know what someone else is doing out there.
5. It's never ok to bully - Don't hide behind your computer and harrass others. It's almost worse than sitting at the lunch table and throwing tuna fish at the "losers." It's not cool and cyber-bullying has and may continue to cause suicides and depression.